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Demons

Westinality

Just got in to San Diego this morning. I awoke at 3 a.m. to take an early flight down here from Oakland, as I had a live radio interview to do.

Now I’m sitting in semi-darkness in my luxurious hotel room, drinking cold coffee and eating cashews. This must be how the Rolling Stones travel!

SD FreewayI’m really tired, but so far as I’ve been able to make out, San Diego is a series of freeways punctuated by malls. There’s a mall just outside this hotel. I’m trying to build up the energy to walk over there so I can get a salad, while also wrestling with my internal slothful demon that suggests I simply order from room service. I wish that demon had his own line of credit; I always get stuck with demons who are as broke as I am.

I have promised myself that on this trip, unlike all previous trips, I will actually do my stretches and core-strengthening exercises, so I don’t return to the Bay Area in a week’s time as a groaning middle-aged Jewish pretzel. Indeed, by formalizing that noble intention in this blog posting I feel I have at least earned the right to brag that I’m thinking about doing the right thing, which should buy me at least another hour of not doing that thing.

Later I’ll run my lines from the two shows I’ll be doing at the San Diego Rep over the next couple of days: Red Diaper Baby (Wed.) and Citizen Josh (Thurs.). It usually takes one session of muttering a show to myself to get a piece back inside my mind and body. But it always feels weird to just be saying the words to myself: the audience is the reason for the monologue. (But at least no one walks out. Usually.)

A card on the desk here informs me that I am invited to participate in “Unwind, a Westin evening ritual” down in the lobby, involving “nuevo-Latino cuisine” and “enticing libations”; I’m a little suspicious that this may be a front for those “Iron John” people. Another option is for me to “revitalize” (as another card says) with a $3.95 bottle of water. Possibly I’ll just follow my hosts’ injunction (on a third card) to “stir up your senses” by brewing “a delicious cup of coffee with our Westin WakeCup brewer.”

But wait! I’m hearing whispering … It’s the bed … the big, squishy-looking bed … Bed-Spirit calls to me! Cannot resist! Cannot …